Becoming Somebody

  Becoming Somebody

  By H. D’Agostino

  Becoming Somebody

  H.D’Agostino

  Copyright © March 2015 by Heather D’Agostino

  All Rights Reserved. This book may not be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission from the author. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. All characters and storylines are the property of the author and your support and respect is appreciated. The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

  The following story contains mature themes, profanity, and graphic sexual situations. It is intended for adult readers.

  Cover design by Kari March at K23Design

  Photography: Kelsey Keeton of K. Keeton Designs

  Models: Cameo Hopper and Storm Bailey

  Editing by Rebecca Cartee @ Editing by Rebecca

  ISBN: 978-0-9907704-5-9

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Becoming Somebody Playlist

  Other Works by H. D’Agostino

  Acknowledgements

  About the Author

  Prologue

  As the door to the jet closed, and the engines began to speed up, I sank down into one of the plush seats. My mother was staring out the window pensively as I fought the sobs trying to consume me. It was happening again. We were leaving… again.

  “I can’t do this anymore,” I wiped at my eyes as I watched the world blur past me. The plane picked up speed, and we left Chicago heading to who knew where.

  “Honey,” my mom turned her head to glance at me.

  “Don’t!” I held my hand up to stop her as I growled.

  “Sam,” she sighed. “You know if I could change things, I would.”

  I dropped my shoulders dejectedly as I wrapped my arms around my middle, “I love him.”

  “I know.” She reached for me as she slid from her seat and moved beside me. “I know you do.”

  “I’m always giving up what I want. When am I going to get something back? When?” My voice rose from an ominous growl to shrieking howl. “He loves me,” I pointed at my chest as I turned to look up at her. “Me. He wants me. Why couldn’t I stay? Why?”

  “You know the answer to that,” she soothed. “He did, too.”

  “Do you even know where we’re going?” I sat up a little straighter and scanned the cabin for Kevin.

  “Nevada,” Kevin nodded as he went back to the laptop that was sitting in his lap.

  “And who am I this time?” I huffed.

  “Sam,” he warned.

  “I know, I know,” I rolled my eyes as the last of my tears began to dry on my cheeks.

  “Your name is Jennifer, and you’re a waitress.” He handed me a manila folder before going back to what he was working on. “I’m looking at apartments right now. I should have you all set by the time we land. It’ll be a hotel for tonight.”

  “Fan-freaking-tastic,” I muttered as I shifted in the seat. This was just great… another bar I’m sure, and another dead-end job to go with it.

  ooooooooo

  A week went by before I started my new job, and surprisingly, it wasn’t as bad as I’d thought it would be. I was working in the restaurant portion of The Venice Casino. It was high-end clientele, and the men didn’t seem to be as grabby. My boss, Andy, seemed nice, too. It didn’t hurt that he was hot, but I knew the rules. I couldn’t get involved, and to tell you truth, I didn’t really want to. My life was crazy enough, and in the back of my mind, I had hopes that Dev would find me. He had promised he would, but I knew from past experience that some promises were easily broken or forgotten, especially when you were looking for someone that the government was trying to hide.

  The apartment that Kevin had found was small, but it worked. It was right outside of Vegas, and my mother’s was only two blocks away. I had asked about us sharing one, but my mother insisted that I was young and needed my space. I couldn’t argue with that, but I didn’t really see myself bringing anyone home anytime soon.

  “We’re pretty slow here tonight,” Andy came waltzing through the tables where I was wiping them down. It was near the end of my shift, and my feet were killing me.

  “Yeah, but it sure was busy earlier,” I smiled as I arranged the salt and pepper shakers.

  “Why don’t you take off after you finish that set-up? I can have someone else finish this,” he smiled at me, and I knew by the look in his eyes that he was secretly thinking about something else. “Hey, Jen?” he grinned. Here it goes… I could see it playing out in his expression. “You wanna grab a drink sometime? Or maybe a coffee after your shift?”

  I closed my eyes as I thought about what I wanted to say. This was my boss. I wasn’t looking to date anyone. I couldn’t. I couldn’t tell him who I was. I couldn’t give him my heart; Dev had it. I also didn’t want to make things awkward here at work. He was cute though, and the way he was standing there expectantly made something inside of me crack a little.

  “I don’t know, Andy,” I looked away. “I’ve got a lot going on in my life.”

  “Just drinks,” he smiled. “I’m not looking for marriage.”

  “Just drinks?” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Am I missing something here?”

  “I want to get to know you better,” he shrugged. “We’ll see where it goes from there.”

  “All right, fine,” I laughed. “Drinks. Give me an hour and I’ll meet you back here, but I’d rather have coffee instead of alcohol. I haven’t been feeling the best for the last few days.”

  “Everything ok?” His grin morphed into a look of concern.

  “Yeah,” I nodded. “I think I’m just run down. I’ve had a lot happen in my life recently. I’m trying to get back on track, but it’s gonna take some time.”

  “Coffee sounds great. See you in an hour,” he turned to walk away, but quickly spun to face me once again, “Hey Jen, relax,” he smirked. “I don’t bite.”

  I giggled, “Yeah, ok,” as I felt my stomach roll once again. Maybe going out tonight wasn’t such a good idea. Maybe I should be in bed trying to get over whatever this was wreaking havoc on my stomach. Maybe I should just stop questioning everything I do. Maybe I should just say screw it and let Andy in. I’ve always wanted to be somebody to someone, and Andy seemed to want me. Could he help heal my broken heart? Could he help me become someone? Only time would tell.

  Chapter 1

  Four Years Later…

  As the sun slowly rose and began to shine through the curtains, the body beside me shifted. I snuggled deeper into the covers and burrowed into his embrace.

  “Good morning,” he mumbled as he placed a light kiss to the top of my head.

  “Mmmm,” I murmured. “It’s not morning yet. I’m still tired.”

  “Did I wear you out last night?” he chuckled as he dipped his chin to capture my lips.

  “No,” I whispered.

  “Jen,” he teased.

  “You’re
so full of yourself,” I jabbed my finger into his side causing him to flinch away from me. It was short lived, but the pain at hearing him call me Jen was still there. I was never gonna be Sam to him. I’d always be Jen, and he’d never think differently.

  “We better get up, or we’re gonna have a repeat of last week,” he warned.

  Before I could respond, the bedroom door burst open, and a whirl of messy blonde locks came barreling into the room. “Mommy!” she squealed as she launched herself onto the bed and forced herself between us.

  “Morning, baby,” I smiled as I brushed my daughter’s hair back out of her eyes. “Did you sleep well? No more monsters?”

  “Yep,” she grinned as she shoved her finger into her mouth. “Can we do something fun today? You promised that when it was nice, we’d do something fun. So can we? Please, can we?”

  “Mara,” I yawned as I glanced out the window and then back at her. She looked so happy, and her innocence was something to be jealous of. She didn’t know my life, and it looked as if she would never have to. We’d been in Nevada since she was born and unless forced to, or the threat disappeared, I didn’t plan to uproot her.

  “Ask Andy,” I whispered as I grinned.

  “Can we, Daddy?” she clasped her hands under her chin and stuck her lips out in a pout. “Please?”

  “Can you clean up your room?” He tried to look stern, but failed miserably.

  “Un huh,” she nodded.

  “And get dressed?” he chuckled.

  “Yeah, yeah,” she rocked back on her heals as if she was ready to pounce.

  “Then I suppose we could go to the park later,” he shrugged as he rolled toward me. “What do you think, honey?”

  “Sounds good to me,” I smiled before looking back at Mara.

  “Yippee!” she squealed as she launched herself off the bed and scampered out of our room.

  “You sure you’re not too tired?” Andy reached for me and tugged me into his arms. “You sure didn’t want to get up earlier.”

  “I’m fine,” I sighed as I let him wrap himself around me, “but we do need to get up.”

  “Fine,” he groaned as he released me and sat up. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stood. I watched him walk toward our bathroom and grinned when he paused in the doorway. “You should take a picture; it’ll last longer,” he called.

  “I’d rather stare, thank you,” I giggled as I watched him shake his head. Andy was good looking, and he seemed to get even better looking with age. He was older than I was, but it didn’t seem to bother him. Having Mara didn’t bother him either. I was thankful for that in many ways. Being a single mom on the run was hard enough, but having the man in my life not accept her would have made it so much worse.

  I found out about Mara shortly after moving to Nevada. Andy had been my boss, but when we started dating, I quit the restaurant gig. Now I worked as a cocktail waitress in the casino. It paid more, and I could still be close to him just not working for him. Mara and I moved into his house when she was just a baby, and we’ve been there ever since. It works for us, and Mara sees him as her father. He’s not, but she doesn’t need to know that. I couldn’t have asked for a better man. He’ll never know what I’ve been through to get here, but I guess that’s good in a way.

  I haven’t heard from Kevin in over six months. The trial has been slow, and they haven’t needed me to testify yet. Kevin did tell me that I’d have to go back to Chicago whenever that happened, but that could still be months away. Andy thinks that Kevin’s my cousin, and that we have family in Chicago. In a way, that’s true, I guess. That’s the last place Dev was, and he’s family now, whether he knows it or not. Kevin won’t tell me where he is, and he hasn’t contacted me. I don’t know how he would though. He doesn’t know Jennifer; he knows Mallory.

  ooooooooo

  It was a beautiful day in Vegas. The sun was high, and even though it was hot, it wasn’t terrible. The park was only a few miles from Andy’s house, and as soon as we got there, Mara practically launched herself out of the car.

  “Honey, wait for us!” I shouted as I watched her bounce toward the swings.

  “You’re too slow!” she giggled as she continued at top speed.

  “Relax,” Andy soothed. “She’s fine.”

  I nodded in agreement, but inside I was screaming at the top of my lungs ‘no, she’s not’. No one understood my protectiveness over her. They saw me as a hovering parent. They didn’t know that every day I feared for her safety. Sure, George didn’t know where I was. He hadn’t sent any of his goons after me from what I could tell. No one from my past knew about her, but I kept envisioning someone grabbing her. She was the only thing I couldn’t lose.

  “She’s such a daredevil,” I sighed. “I’m worried she’s gonna hurt herself.”

  “She’s a kid; kids get hurt. She needs to be independent. You’ve got to let her do things for herself,” Andy reached for my hand. He laced his fingers in mine and began leading me over to a park bench under a nearby tree. “You can see her just fine from here,” he mumbled as he felt me resist slightly.

  “Yeah, ok,” I muttered just as my phone began to vibrate in my pocket. I held up my hand to signal that I needed a minute as I tugged the phone out to check the caller ID. It was Kevin, and my heart fluttered in my chest. Every time he called me, I prayed that he’d have news about Dev. I needed to know he was ok, that he’d made it out ok, and that George wasn’t after him. “Hey,” I answered hesitantly.

  “Sam. Can you talk?” His voice was low and quiet.

  “Not really,” I grumbled. “I’m at the park with Andy.”

  “I know,” Kevin’s voice echoed through the line. “I’m watching you right now.”

  “What?” I gasped as I began frantically searching the area for the telltale sign of the Marshals. There was no van, no dark sedan, no nothing. “Where?”

  “Look to your six,” the line clicked off as I spun around.

  There, off in the distance, was a dark figure straddling a motorcycle. His hand rose in acknowledgement and I nodded as I began walking back over to where Andy was sitting. “Can you watch her for a minute? I need to use the Ladies Room,” I pointed to the out building several feet away.

  “Sure,” he smiled at me. “Take your time. We’ll be fine.”

  “Thanks,” I darted my eyes to where Mara was playing, and then turned and briskly headed over to Kevin, who now stood beside the back with his helmet off.

  “What’s going on?” I panicked. “Is everything ok? Is it Dev? Did something happen?”

  “Sam,” he sighed. “Breathe.” He stuffed his phone in his pocket and flipped his sunglasses up on top of his head. “Let’s go over here,” he motioned to a spot in the shade.

  “Ok, but what’s going on?” I began pacing around. It wasn’t like Kevin to beat around the bush. He never held back and was always brutally honest.

  “It’s over,” his eyes looked relieved, and suddenly, the weight that this whole ordeal had put on him was blatantly obvious.

  “What?” I placed my hands on top of my head and slowly dragged them down my face.

  “The trial. It’s over. George is in prison,” his mouth turned up in a crooked smile.

  “But what about me? How come no one had to talk to me?” Confused by this new information, my emotions had yet to catch up to my brain.

  “We had enough taped evidence from your dad, and between the undercover work, and the new witnesses that have come forward, we didn’t need you,” he placed his hand on my shoulder. “It’s over. You can go home now. Back to New York. You can be Sam again.”

  “I don’t even know who that is anymore,” I mumbled.

  “I thought you’d be happy about this,” he gripped the back of his neck.

  “I’m confused. I know I’m supposed to be happy, but things are good right now. I have Mara, Andy, a home, and job… I sort of have everything I’ve wanted.”

  “But are you happy?” Ke
vin’s head tilted to the side as he stared at me.

  “I don’t know what happy feels like; it’s been so long. I’ve learned to be good at faking it,” I glanced over to where Mara was still playing on the swings. “She thinks Andy’s her dad. She doesn’t even know him…” I trailed off.

  “I don’t know where he is right now, but I do know that he was calling Chicago ‘home base’ for a while. He needs to know about her, and you need to be the one to tell him,” he sighed as he looked in the same direction I was. “If you’re happy here, then stay, but I think you’re fooling yourself.”

  “There’s no thinking about it. I just…” I paused as I watched my daughter run into my boyfriend’s arms and laugh. “How do I tell him? What do I tell him? He loves me, and he doesn’t even know who I am?”

  “Tell him the truth,” Kevin flipped his sunglasses back down. “Tell him everything. If he loves you like you think he does, then he’ll understand.”

  “I don’t know if I can. I’ve been lying to him for so long. He’s gonna wonder why I never told him the truth.”

  “You have to try,” Kevin glanced over at Andy one last time before he turned and headed back to his bike. “If you’re happy here, stay, but if you want to go anywhere,” he waved his hand in the air, “let me know, and I’ll help you.”

  “Anywhere?” I lifted my brows.

  “Anywhere,” he gave a quick jerk of his head as he swung his leg over the bike.

  “Thanks,” I smiled at him, “for everything.”

  “You’re welcome,” his voice softened as he slipped his helmet on and cranked the bike. “If you need anything, call me.” Before I could answer, the bike lurched forward and Kevin took off.

  ooooooooo

  “Mommy?” Mara’s voice trembled slightly. “Where are we going?”

  I’d told Andy about everything as soon as we’d gotten back home. It didn’t go well to put it mildly. His face had paled as I watched him fight to find his footing. I was taking everything he knew about me and blowing it to bits. He’d waited until Mara went into her room to play before he’d exploded. “I can’t believe you fucking lied to me! Don’t I mean anything to you? Did you not think you could trust me?” he slapped at his chest. “What about her?” he pointed at Mara’s closed door.